Chatter on Children
Tips for a Winning Grandparenting
Why grandparenting and not just parenting? Because. Parents enjoy a break for short periods of time, children enjoy getting away from their parents from time to time and grandparents enjoy being a special part of this essential relationship. As a grandfather of six grandchildren, I can tell you for sure that building on a special relationship between grandparents and grandchildren is a lifetime privilege. As grandchildren grow, the principles of the relationship remain applicable at any age, but the role of the grandparents in the lives of their grandchildren changes. Grand Parental Control and Safety of the Grandchildren All children need to be warned about the limits and must learn to respect boundaries. Unfortunately, our children learn in kindergartens and schools only about their rights, not much about their obligations.
However, grandparents can intervene yearly in their grandchildren’s education and help them to understand the life limits and boundaries. When an activity begins you, as a grandparent, must be clear about your expectations. This fact frees you and the grandchild to enjoy the event and guarantees the safety of everyone involved. When the restrictions are being violated, always remind your grandchildren again about the rules and restate them as many times as necessary. A very good idea is to write the rules and post them in a visible place.
If a rule is violated during your shared activity, ask the child to repeat or read (if the child can do it, of course.) the rules again. Parents’ Wishes and Rules Must Be Pursued Anything you do for your grandchild needs to be planned and discussed first with the parents, who make the rules. Helpful grandparents must support the parents in children’s education. Never keep secrets from the parents and never ask the grandchildren to keep secrets from their parents. And, do not undermine the relationships between the parents and the child by considering that some information should not be shared with the parents! A Successful Grandparenting Requires Proper Planning. Proper planning makes any activity more successful. It is safer to have a plan and to discuss the activity with the parents. Of course, you can be spontaneous, but this should happen within a planned activity. When start planning, discuss with the child and the parents what he or she would like to do.
Before you begin any activities, see what is appropriate for the child’s age. In this way you are giving your grandchildren choices and increasing their self-confidence. The Best Gift for Your Grandchildren Is the “Time Together” Physical gifts (objects) are an option and do not have to be very expensive. Also, surprise gifts are the best, as a gift is real especially when it is unexpected. Do not forget that “time together” is the best gift we can give to our grandchildren. A well-planned journey provides time for the grandparent and grandchildren to discover and appreciate each other’s real life gifts. Giving time your will achieve friendship and great success with your grandparenting! Grandchildren and Grandparents Should Have Fun! Having fun is good for you, your grandchild and your relationship. Be always ready to share with your grandchildren how excited you are about being together.
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